Their paths are not mine, therefore I must be open to that. And, I totally agree that if we are not screwed up in some way, we will not become great. Greatness often comes from humble beginnings, else why would anyone bother to even try?

Good post

I’m not ashamed to say I spoil my kids. I don’t judge anyone else who does or doesn’t - do your own thing - just don’t judge me when I do mine.

I live (and teach) in an upper-middle class area (we landed here by accident when houses were less unaffordable) and I am appalled at not only what children expect, but what they’re routinely given without a second thought. Among 43 5th graders, more than half have their own cell phones and more than 2/3 their own ipods. Astounding. But I digress.

We are doing far better financially now than when we first had kids, but I still act like going to Wal-Mart on a Friday is a big ol’ treat. We don’t skimp on food (although some store brands are fine) and I don’t skimp on my own shoes anymore. The kids’ everyday sneakers are usually a good name, but (shhh…..) I will buy jeans, suits, and dress shoes for them at a reputable thrift shop since they grow out of them faster than they wear them out.

Okay, not sure where all that came from, but…thanks!

Forgot to mention the big wake-up call I got about making everything “just so” for our kids. When my eldest was a toddler, not quite two, I told him to go outside to play in his sandbox, which he adored. He started having hysterics and being so young, was soooo hard to understand. Finally managed to decipher…, he wouldn’t go outside unless his shorts AND his top matched!!!! WTF?!?!? I guess since he was the first child, grandchild, etc., he had never really suffered the indignity of unstylish clothes. OMFG. I still like to ‘embarrass’ him w/ that story from time to time ; P

BTW I never admit that my children might be spoiled…, they are just “well loved”!

we’d give our very lives if not our souls for the shits.

Altho I love the slavish devotion you give to untitledson (yea, like I’ve never done THAT before, lol!), Flubberwinkle does have a point. I’m on my third kid, with the youngest being 7 and the oldest being 23 and I can’t really remember mine bugging me for anything name-brand (at least not for long!) They’ve always seen me economize on most of our stuff because I’m permanently disabled and it’s hard to make money stretch, esp. with the medical procedures & meds I have to have. Well, actually, I guess that reasoning isn’t all the way true…, I wasn’t disabled until after #3 was born…., altho money has always been fairly tight, at least I was able to work before. I guess my problem is more along the lines of, if I spend more on this then we can’t spend anything on that. And that, to me, is usually books, adventures, art supplies (not the Ben Franklin stuff, believe me), and even our vacation this summer when we will be renting a cabin on a lake in Minnesota for a week–ah, fishing, nature walks, burning marshmallows falling into the fire, sketching, reading…., nirvana w/o much technology for me & my boys (hubbie included in that, of course).

I do always explain why to them tho…, and show them how to compare quality & value and values (Nike still hasn’t showed me that they aren’t using child labor and I won’t buy from anyone I know is abusing others). They’ve always gotten over it pretty quickly. Okay, okay, the 23 year old is into name brands now BUT he has his own household and his own money so that’s his choice. Plus, since he & his boyfriend don’t want kids, it’s not like they have to factor that in.

Anyway, it can be a real pain in the ass dealing with this when they get to that age of consumerism, but money management is one of the best things we can teach them and if you start early you won’t have as much detritus to wade thru to make them understand.

Sorry to ramble…, swear to God I’ve been raising kids for about a million years now!!!

Other than food, I economize on most of the rest. I spend more on my daughter’s clothes because her skin is sensitive and the better quality cottons (pima and ringspun) make a difference for her so we shop Lands End and Hanna Andersson.

Where do I really cut loose to give them the “best”? Education. My income paid for private schools in the U.S. and I’ve written lots of checks for educational things they wanted to do: nature camps, art lessons, music lessons, etc. And pretty much if they ask for any book, I’m going to buy it!