At work, I’ve been volunteering with our Secret Santa program. I sit at a table during my lunch hour, and take down employees’ names who want to sponsor a local child by buying them a gift or two for the holidays. For many of these disadvantaged children, it’s the only gift they’ll get. I know this because in past years, I have attended the holiday party during which I noticed some were not opening their gifts. I asked the program coordinator about it, and she told me they often choose to save their one gift for Christmas morning. Now that gives you something to think about.
I volunteered for Secret Santa thinking this experience would feed my soul and raise my awareness. It most definitely has. But it has also shown me a few other things:
1. The most giving people are those who can least afford to do so. People earning under $25K are dropping $50-$100 in the Secret Santa program while I’ve seen executive after executive walk on by without so much as giving us a second look. Maybe they donate in other ways. I’m just not seeing it.
2. Brownies seem to bring out the worst in people. I can’t tell you the number of people who have walked right past the sign-up sheet and gone straight for the treats table, where we serve complimentary cookies and bars to Secret Santa participants. Un-friggin-real.
3. Just when I thought my childhood sucked, reality comes along to whap me upside the head. Looking at the kids’ wish lists, I see some of them are asking for toys. Many others just want winter coats and snow boots. One child even asked for a haircut. That’s right — a haircut.
Being poor sucks. But being poor at Christmastime sucks even harder. It’s positively soul-killing. Surely there is a toy drive in your town going on right now. When you’re out holiday shopping in the next few weeks, give a little less to that person on your list that you don’t really like anyway. Then use that money to buy a toy. In a few weeks, you will soooo be making someone’s day.
Thank you for this post……
As a child I was one of these kids…..one christmas we had pizza. It wasnt regular pizza. It was spaghetti sauce on white bread with a slice of processed cheese. It was wonderful and one of my favorite snacks now as an adult. Christmas to me is a terrible time of year. So commercial and fake. People like you are the difference. I am in a position now to give back and by golly….. give back I do. Keep up the hard work….and screw the people looking for brownies. There will be some very happy and thankful children come christmas time and those brownies wont even matter any more.
I’ve been that kid praying that Santa brings me something aside from hot dogs to eat for Christmas. And that is sucky that folks eat the snacks and walk off. I’d position myself so that they could hear , “What do you MEAN you lost the POT brownies?!”
Cool site- I dig it.
I’ve experiened the ones with the least give the most & the monied walking by without giving… but oh i’ll have a brownie - while working fundraisers over the years. Never fails to amaze me and piss me off. Just look each of those nibblers in the eye and say, “thanks for supporting a child who otherwise might not be able to celebrate the holiday as we do.”…maybe they’ll choke on their brownie.
Every year since I was 18 I had gone to the Salvation Army Angel Tree and picked up an angel. I was pretty damn broke but wanted to do my part. The past few years I have abandoned the Salvation Army Tree for a lesser known local charity. Here is why. A few years ago when I went to pick up an angel from the tree, I couldn’t find a one with a gift listed that I could afford. I started to suspect that the parents were filling these out when a 3 yr old named Jamal wanted an x-box for Christmas. WTF! Nearly every angel on the tree wanted an X-Box, Playstation, DVD player, Sterio, Ipod, computer and so on. Again, WTF! I used to always get a want item and a need item. Example, a Barbie and a coat, or a basketball and socks and underwear, a skateboard and some jeans. The first year I strayed from Salvation Army, my husband pulled an Angel from the tree in his building sponsered by a local charity. She wanted a Bratz doll and a coat. By golly gee she got the coolest Bratz doll out there and the hottest little fuzzy coat from Gap Kids.
While working for my degree in Social Work, I headed up an Adopt A Child For Christmas program, I never worked so hard in my life as I did in those few months… but what a rewarding job it was! So many children had need of things that were unimaginable… not only did these children need the basics, such as clothing and shoes, but they also needed beds, the bedding to go on the beds, then there was the Christmas meal that every child wanted and deserved to have to make Christmas day a memorable day.
We had such a huge need that year when I was doing my internship and amazingly enough, we managed to get the sponsors to donate everything we needed as well as adopt each family. If you are having trouble getting your children adopted for the holidays then do a little public humility (as I did) ~ call people out on their “blessings”, maybe if they see how they’ve been blessed in front of others they might be more inclined to give to others.
I hope that things go better for you in this venture because these children deserve so much more than what they are getting. Good luck! Happy Holidays!
Untitled, I think you should hand out some of your famous W stickers to the Compassionate Conservatives who bypass your table and eat your brownies.
V-Grrrl
In the law firm I worked for it was the same way. The paralegals gave and gave and gave, and the partners did nothing. At the time we were making about $40k a year and had a $1200 rent payment, $800 daycare bill, owed $20k in medical bills for our daughter, and had a car payment. We made our own food, never even went to the movies. But I felt so good buying the cutest jacket ever and an outfit for one little girl plus going together to sponsor an entire family with some other coworkers. I always want to see their faces Christmas morning!
I always like to get matching scarf and mittens for those wanting a coat. And I put little treats in the pockets…lip gloss, candy, funky socks, paperback book. My garden club buys gifts that we take down to the prison and let female inmates pick presents that we help them wrap for their children. You talk about eye-opening.
I’m getting so many great ideas from this post and from the comments. Not only will it make us feel good to give something fabulous to a little punkin pie, but it will be a wonderful life lesson for our own little punkin pie.
It breaks my heart that so many kids go without all year long, but especially at the holidays. As for those callous jerks who take treats but refuse to donate time or money, I would tell them to back off. Seriously - I can’t see the harm in politely asking them, “Have you signed up? The treats are for those who are sponsoring a child.”
I was that kid too. I look back at it fondly b/c of what has transpired in my life. I don’t think I would do it differently if I could. I’ve seen how “having too much” can ruin a person’s soul.
Kudos to you for taking some action and trying to make the world a better place.
I have found that to be too true. That those who can afford it the least are the most willing to donate to anything reeking of charity. The rich keep on getting richer while us poor keep on getting poorer! Great idea, thinking our yearly gift exchange should be more GIVING. To those less fortunate.
sorry, make that gift EXCHANGE not gift excharge
But really, I am inspired by this post and will be mentioning it to the boss tomorrow.. Thank you.
I think you should put laxatives and cocaine in the brownies. Tip off the nice guys, and watch the evil ones writhe in a glorious release of the bowels. Then get fired, cuz, you know….they do blow.
I was one of those kids on several occasions. I will say that BY FAR the Christmases that mean the most to me are the ones when I only received one or two gifts. There is something magical about receiving a gift that you know your family didn’t have the money to buy. I suppose it is because you just don’t ‘expect’ it, so when you receive a special gift, it really is a miracle.
This post has really inspired me and helped me connect to those ghosts of Christmas past. I will be buying a coat and mittens stuffed with goodies for a child this year.
This year, my husband and I have donated the money we would have spent on gifts for the adults in our family to help hurricane victims. We have asked our family to send the money they would have spent on gifts for us to the hurricane relief charity of their choice. I just couldn’t see how any of us needed a new sweater or DVD worse than anything the hurricane victims might need. And I can’t tell you how liberating it is not to have to chose gifts for my in-laws!
What a GREAT IDEA MEL!!! Finally! Something said that can change matters and actually make a difference! We live in Houston, where alot of the hurricane victims still are, and even though there is still outreach going on here ~ people are starting to forget and go about their own lives… especially with Christmas around the corner. Some of the hurricane victims still haven’t found jobs, and not without trying. Yes, Houston is a large city, but the umeployment rate it high here and the Houstonians were already looking for jobs ~ so jobs are tights and hard to come by. Some people are working 3 and 4 lower wage jobs just to make ends meet and still are barely making it by. So please folks… give Mel’s comment and second and third thought ~ and possibly, if we all did something like this, even if it was just a gift card to somewhere such a Kohl’s or
Babie’s R Us, that would go such a long way. There is a Great organization here that my husband and I donated alot of things to right after the hurricane and isn’t far from my home (unfortunately, I’ve forgotten the name to it right now, Baby Brain at the moment, sorry :~( but if there is an interest to this post I can get the name for you.)
Sorry, but I just remembered the name to that charity that we donated to… it’s called Interfaith Caring Ministries. It is a nonprofit organization. If there is any kind of interest in donating to this, just post. I’m going out of town for the holidays but will be back in town after Thanksgiving and will check back in after then. If there is any interest of donating to this charity I will get you their address and phone number so that you can check them out ~ that way you can see if they are legit before you send your donation… I want you to feel completely safe in what you are doing and know that what you are sending is going to get to where you want it to go.
Have A Happy Thanksgiving!!!
Last year ( well and this year too) my husband and i were having some financial difficulties– there were lots of presents under the tree but mostly because i wrapped each pair of socks sepeartely and because my family sent gifts before christmas. But the best feeling ever was when someone from our church came and said that someone had left these on his porch with a note to deliver them to us. It was only 4 presents — one for each of our children - they were quite thoughtful and were definitely from someone who knew my children well. I was shocked - and i still have no idea who sent the gifts. I felt bad too cause I suddenly felt bad and guilty- we are not by any means poor- we live in a large nice house and have 2 nice cars but like most of america we are extremely overextended- i felt guilty (and still do) cause I know we created this situation mostly because were those kids that got nothing on christmas and had nothing growing up. BUT despite my feelings of guilt the gifts were greatly appreciated AND about 2 days prior we had wrapped up presents for 2 kids that my husband pulled their wishes off the tree at his work– SO i guess what comes around really does go around.